So…. I had planned to write this post last night, but fatigue got the best of me (it is amazing how your stamina changes after lots of treatment). So my blog went live on Tuesday night then almost immediately, I started to receive feedback. I was so excited in my hyper super excited state (many may argue I am always in this state), I began reading messages to my husband. I had shown him my layout before going live, and had encouraged him to read it, but he seemed disinterested. I honestly wondered if my posts would be too much for him to read. This is not an easy adventure…. Well, I was wrong and my reading of responses to him must have made him excited, because on Wednesday morning as he was laying in bed half asleep, he asked how do I find your blog….
I thought he was forwarding it to someone, maybe sending it to his Mother, but no he was reading it and really reading it. After we got the kids off to school, he started to show me my spelling and grammar mistakes. I fixed them all. At this point in my head I was thinking if you would have read this when I tried to show it to you before I published the site, I wouldn’t have made typos…. I hate typos. But then, he told me to look at my About Me section and said something to the effect of- you haven’t been diagnosed with Pancreatic High Grade Neuroendocrine Cancer for 28 months. You aren’t telling the whole story, you are simplifying it. Then he encouraged me to write the whole story of my diagnosis because the simplicity of my current diagnosis does not explain the adventure we went on for the first 19-20 months where despite a couple biopsies, tons of pathological tests, scans, lab work, genetic tumor tests, 2 major cancer centers and many doctors no one could tell us definitively what type of cancer I had nor where it started. All we know definitively was that it was small cell, very aggressive, that my liver at initial diagnosis was 60-80% compromised and the odds were stacked against us. A third biopsy in the summer of 2018 (after the cancer grew and spread), confirmed the high grade neuroendocrine, and then the pancreatic primary site was only deduced when I visited a 3rd major cancer center in December 2018. I will post more in detail about this in a later post. It has been an adventure where unknowns have been more common than knowns, where I was lucky enough to have a pioneer in the cancer world find chemo that worked for me. I cannot wait to tell you about him.
My husband wants me to share the details- good, bad, and giggle worthy of the whole adventure. And my favorite comment just a few minutes after publishing my site was from my 21 year old (at college) who simply wrote “I am proud of you”. Words cannot express how grateful I am for my husband and kids who support me being me, bald or not. (Let’s see if he reads this before I post it, I am getting ready to hand the computer over…..) He did!!!
P.S. Thank you all for reading and commenting and most importantly for your prayers, positivity, and support. Last I looked I was at over 900 hits (I know I account for at least 40…. I check it often LOL)
Enjoying and sharing your blog!
Thanks Rosa- we need to get together this summer!
Your writing style is very good. I hang on Every word. I understand your journey a bit better. I wonder to myself, would I be as brave,courageous and full of fight as Steph is ? I hope I never have to find out but I can tell you I do think you are putting up an Amazing Fight. #kickcancersass
❤
Wendy,
Thank you for your unwavering, uncensored, continual support. Not sure what we would do without you. We love you.
You help me be brave and courageous. I consider you family. So lucky to have you be part of the family.
Stefanie,
From the first time I met you, I knew you were extraordinary! Thank you for writing about your story. My positive thoughts are with you.
Thank you!! I greatly appreciate your encouragement and positive support. (Ironically, Jamon was retelling me a story about your husband not that long ago. Chemo brain- I have no idea what it was about.) My best to your family.
May you know how you impact others with your words and our love…
sending love to you…..
Thank you Sylvia
Love you! In simple terms you are amazingly awesome!!! You inspire me every day!!! I believe! GOL
Giggle Friends Forever! Thank you for your continued unwavering support. Love you.
May you feel love throughout your journey.
I am lucky that I do. Thank you for thinking of me.
Thank you for being the most strong-willed person I have ever met. Since hearing the news. I have cried. I have asked why. It makes me sad and mad that this happened to someone I know. YOU ARE AMAZING. Don’t ever take what you go through for granted. For me, I can’t imagine what I would do. But you have been an inspiration. You don’t take no for an answer and I am extremely proud of you. I have shared your blog with all of the women I know because it is INSPIRING. I especially wanted to share it with my co-worker because of what his going through now with his girlfriend. I have shared your story with him countless times to motivate them to seek a second opinion. A third opinion. Not settle for just anyone because ultimately IT IS YOUR LIFE. No one will fight for it better than you.
I have taken forever to reply, because I don’t know what to say.
Have shed tears reading your message again and again.
Thank you for sharing. I really hope by sharing my journey, fears, thoughts that I can help others.
I am so lucky you are part of my family.
Thank you for always checking on me.
We need to get the cousins together. They need to know each other on a deeper level.
Hope we see you soon- Miss you.
We love you for your fight both of us have had that fight Jane very successful me I am still waiting to see It is a hard battle we know.Our prayers are with you and you with the strength that you have shown will win.
Thank you for your continued prayers and support.
I am so happy you continue to get positive news.
Sending lots of prayers your way.
You’re an amazingly strong and courageous woman and wonderfully loving, supportive and honest mother. I am blessed to know you.
I pray that you continue to inspire everyone you come in contact with and always find the ray of sunshine when it’s pouring.
Thank you Brittney!
We miss you!